Readjusting
by Lo.Taylor
Summary: Soda goes off to war and when he returns he expects nothing to have changed-nothing to have gone on without him. Everyone expects him to be the same too. Can he revert to being the same happy-go-lucky Soda he once was?
1. Chapter 1

Hi everyone! I haven't done a story in forever and I'm really nervous about putting it up. It is a Vietnam fic about how different Soda is when he returns from war. Do not expect happy, sensitive, tell-me-your-problems Soda. Like anyone who returned from fighting in a war, he is changed and it's going to take him awhile adjust, that is IF he can adjust to his old life!!

I researched all this as much as I could but please let me know what is wrong (pertaining to facts about the war or facts in general that I screwed up) so I can fix it. Thanks for reading! Hope you like…

My foot wouldn't stop bouncing on the floor of the bus as much as I wanted it to. My hands were tapping my knees at a racing speed and I wished more than anything that I had something to occupy them with. For the last year and a half I had carried a gun night and day and it was very noticeable not to have it now especially now.

"Curtis, you wanna cool it?" The guy sitting next to me grumbled, annoyed at my constant fidgeting. I threw him a smile and he smiled back before rolling his eyes and returning his gaze out the window. The Sergeant stood at the head of the bus and everyone else sat up straight and put their palms on their knees.

"Well men, I just want to congratulate you on a job well done. Enjoy your families, get some good partying' done and keep safe. You hear?"

"HOOAH!" Boomed the men on the bus. It was an automatic response by now.

"When you wear those tags you are representing the United States Army and you are to act accordingly. With that said, will you men drink and drive?"

"NO SERGEANT!" The bus erupted.

"Will you hit your wife or your girl?"

"NO SERGEANT!"

"Will you beat your kids?"

"NO SERGEANT!"

"Will you kick your dog?"

"NO SERGEANT!"

"Will you sleep with someone underage?"

"NO SERGEANT!"

This was the usual liberty speech we got every time before being released to our own time. This however, is our first time being released to our families, being released back into the civilian world.

The bus turned the corner and a swarm of cheers filled the streets. The buildings were decorated with red, white and blue streamers. There were "WELCOME HOME!" banners hung between pillars and streetlamps. There was a huge crowd of people gathered along the sidewalks. They were all cheering, some were waving flags and most were crying.

"Men, Welcome Home!" The Sergeant bellowed with a huge smile plastered on his face. With that the bus came to a stop and men stampeded to the door. A few guys even opened the emergency exit door in a hurry to be reunited with their families.

I was wildly searching for my brothers. In my way through the crowd I saw moms crying over their sons return and girlfriends leaping on their lovers and showering them with kisses. I came to a stop when I saw a woman holding a baby that couldn't be more than a month or two old. The man in uniform looked at it nervously after kissing his wife. Although, he was too far away to hear, Soda read the lips of the woman, her head titled toward the bundle in her arms. "Meet your daddy." She handed the newborn to her husband who broke down into tears pulling his wife into his arm as they gazed into their child's face.

"Sodapop! Sodapop Curtis!" That was Steve! I whirled around and there they were. My smile slid off my face when I realized how long it's been. I took a few steps forward and I was face to face with Two-Bit. I didn't say anything, I couldn't. I just reached my hand out to shake his.

Man, had he aged. He had a scruffy beard and deep circles under his eyes. His eyes were wide and laughing as they used to when he'd tell a joke but he kept his mouth shut tight. He pulled me in for a hug.

Standing next to him was Steve. Nothing was really changed about him, not that I could tell anyway. His mouth opened and closed like he wanted to say something but couldn't find words. Man, could I relate! I offered the same gesture to him as I had to Two-Bit and he gave my hand a forceful shake while nodding his head.

I continued down the line they had formed to my older brother. He had certainly aged in the year and a half I'd been in the Army. He had shaved but the shadow was appearing, although it was barely noon. His eyes had large circles under them. They were rimmed with tears and I went straight for a hug. I looked up at him and we shared a look that said more than words could even hope to.

Next was Pony. I took a step to my left and was immediately engulfed in a hug. His arms were wrapped tightly around me with his head pressed into my chest. His sobs were so strong they shook me. After a minute I pulled back to look at him. He grew. He was nearly as tall as me now and maybe even had a bigger build than me. His hair was the light gold it always turned in summer. He didn't look any older though. No, he was still my little brother.

I took a step back so I could look at everyone at once. There I stood for a full minute staring at the people that were my whole life just awhile ago but now I didn't even know them. It had only been a year, how different could things be? Well that awkward feeling I have right now and the fact that although I'm standing within arms length of them, I've never felt so distant, those tell me just how different things were.


	2. Chapter 2

"I'll have a burger and chocolate shake."

We were at the restaurant ordering lunch after a few minutes of just staring at each other. None of us were too keen about staying at the festivities being held so we drove a mile or so into town and stopped at a hamburger joint on the side of the road.

I couldn't help but smile at Pony's order. Maybe things haven't changed all that much. He caught me looking at him and shot me a confused glance but couldn't get a word in before Two-Bit piped up.

"So buddy, how's it feel to be home? We're sure glad to have you back." I stared at him for a second. That didn't sound like Two-Bit. I couldn't for the life of me think of the last time he talked other than to offer a joke or a close resemblance. I would have remarked about this but his question was starting to nag at me.

How does it feel to be home?

"Nothing special yet," I simply stated. I glanced out the window and when I focused my attention back at the table I realized that everyone was staring me, an unknown look on each face. I inwardly shrugged it off and looked around the place. There was a group of girls sitting a few tables away and I couldn't help noticing the curves of their bodies. How long it's been since I'd seen a girl! I was really tempted to get up and talk to them, especially the brunette when Darry spoke up.

"Pony made honor roll. The marks just came home."

I nodded my head, not sure what to say. The guys over in Vietnam never asked for praise and I didn't know how to handle this. Actually they probably would have made fun of a guy for an announcement like this. I imagined Roberts bent over at the waist laughing before able to get out a good insult. I smiled at the memory of the boys.

Pony must have thought the smile was caused by praise for him and he blushed and focused his attention on a rip in the plastic booth. Everyone was still staring at me so I cleared my throat before asking what else had happened in everyone's lives in the year and a half I had been gone.

"I graduated high school!" Two-Bit exclaimed sounding like he just remembered.

"No way! What do you do with your time?" I thought back to the old Two-Bit. He chose the comfortable predictability of high school over the hard reality of a job in the world. His choice required him to fail every grade twice and I had a feeling that even if he hadn't graduated on his own, the school would have done it just to get rid of him.

"I got a job."

"A job, huh? Isn't that what old guys do? Ya know, the responsible type."

"Yeah well since Margaret up and left…A guy's gotta do what a guy's gotta do." He stumbled with the words, signifying that it was a touchy subject.

"Margaret?" I asked, intrigued.

"yeah," he mumbled.

"Wait, you don't know Margaret!" Pony pointed out. I could only stare at him. There was something in his tone I couldn't quite recognize. Maybe relief?

Darry gave me a quick story on how Two-Bit had knocked up a blonde and had to persuade her to keep their baby. The woman, Margaret apparently, said she wanted nothing to do with it and left town no more than two days after she popped it out. Since then, Two-Bit has been raising a newborn and working nights at the same bar Darry works.

"What's her name?"

"Kimberly Patricia Matthews," Two-Bit stated proudly. The disgusted look caused by talk of his latest fling had been replaced with a glowing look of joy for his child. If I was surprised at the fact that Two-Bit had graduated school, the picture of him with a job and a kid left me downright floored.

I didn't want to talk anymore but more importantly I didn't want to listen. I just wanted to think. I needed to adapt back to the life I left before I could catch up to the lives everyone else lead. It was weird sitting here. Only a little over a year ago I had known almost everything there was to know about this group of people and back then I would have been involved in the discussion of the decisions they were telling me about now. It felt strange not to be a part of something I had joined in on not too long ago. I didn't like that they made these lives for themselves without me. The fact that they didn't need me now struck a cord within me and I wondered if they had ever needed me.

Even though I didn't want to hear about their Soda-less lives, didn't mean they didn't want to talk about them. Two-Bit was in the middle of explaining some new plan of Steve's when I realized I hadn't heard a word.

"-so he should have it by summer's end. Isn't that right Steve?" Steve glanced up at me nervously making me wonder what the heck he would have done by summer's end, as Two-Bit had put it.

"That's the plan," Steve stated without emotion. "Hope you don't mind, Soda." He had reverted his eyes to the plate that had just been set before him.

"Why would I mind?"

"Well, it was always our plan to buy our own place but I couldn't wait, ya see? It might be sold and the timing was right and I finally saved up the money." He spoke the last part quickly as if he thought I might storm out before he could finish. Lucky for him I still didn't have a clue as to what he was talking about.

"Our own place?"

He stared at me a minute before continuing. "Yeah Soda, we always talked about starting up our own mechanic's. You'd stand by the street and I'd be under the hood." I thought back two years ago. One day when work was slow, me and Steve thought up a plan to fix up our own business. It was all in fun until we realized it wasn't so bad of an idea and since then we saved every extra dollar and put it toward our fund.

I couldn't take my eyes off Steve. I can't believe he would just go and start up his own place when we had plans to do it together. Hell, the fact that he _could_ start his own place without waiting for me, stung. I didn't want to hear another word about what everyone decided they should do in my absence-about what they didn't need me for-and luckily they didn't start up again.


	3. Chapter 3

On the car-ride home I remembered the night all this started. The night I got the draft notice.

I had just gotten home from a long day at work and I had a race in a couple hours. I picked up barrel racing now that I was old enough to not have to get Darry's permission. He wasn't too happy but what could he do?

"Dinner ready?" I threw my shoes close to the wall and aimed my keys at the coffee table.

"Soda, that you?"

"Course it's me Dar. Who else? Hey Pone," I greeted, now in the kitchen.

Pony nodded and Darry looked at me nervously before speaking up . "Uh, Soda, so I called the high school and they said you could re-enroll in school." He didn't look at me and if it wasn't for that, I'd think he was joking.

"Dar, I dropped out of school." It was the only thing I could think to say and it came out more harsh than I'd meant it to.

"Right but they'd take you back. Of course you'd have to start where you left-" Darry began but I cut him off. "Why would I want to go back?" I sounded almost incredulously.

"It's in your best interest. Dropping out was a mistake and you need to go back." He dared a quick look at me before returning to mashing the potatoes.

"What are you talking about? Where is this coming from?" I was trying not to get mad but this didn't make any sense.

"Soda, it doesn't matter. The bottom line is that you are going to school. The end." Darry was at a full-blown yell now and I couldn't help but raise my voice the same.

"No it is not _the end_! It is my life and I'll decide what to do with it and I decided to drop out of school. What is your problem? Why the sudden change?" I stole a glance at Pony who was frozen in fear. I would have laughed at the face he was making if I wasn't so heated. This isn't right. It isn't right at all. It was always Darry and Pony who fought, granted not much lately and I would have a look similar to the one Pony is wearing.

"Damnit, Soda! You are going to school!" he bellowed shaking the house. I didn't say anything. I just stared at him-at his eyes specifically. Were they rimmed with tears? I softened my expression and gave my older brother a pleading glace to let me into his mind.

"Pony, go to your room. Give us a minute." Darry demanded much calmer than he had been seconds ago. Pony hadn't moved, still in shock and I put a hand on his shoulder.

"The kid stays. He is part of this family." I knew whatever this was, was big and I just had a feeling Pony needed to hear it too. Darry hadn't yelled at me since I was nine years old and wanted nothing more than to follow him and his friends around town. So Darry yelling now, made me really nervous and even a little scared.

"I'm not a kid," Pony mumbled taking a seat at the table Darry was now sitting at. I smiled at him, but only for a split second.

Darry pulled a paper out from his jeans and held it in shaking hands. He took three quivering breaths and tried to pull himself together enough to speak but gave up and handed the paper to me. My mind raced as to what the paper held. I looked up at Darry who had tears streaming from his face now. Every so often his mouth would open but nothing would come out and he would close it again. Pony shifted his gaze back and forth between us. I had no doubt it scared him to see Darry cry. Hell, it scared me to see him cry!

I took a deep breath and unfolded the paper.

By now we had pulled into the driveway of our house. After recalling that memory, I had the strong urge to hug my brothers but as I scooted out of the car my dog tags rubbed against my chest reminding me that I'm different now. I haven't hugged anyone in over a year. It's just not something you do with cammies on, in the middle of fire.

The feeling I got as I stepped into the house was the strangest I've had all my life. It looked and smelled like home. This was the home I left-the one I'd loved. Yet here I was, for the first time in a year and holding my sea bag filled with United States Army uniforms and a handful of letters I'd received while in another country.

I stood in the doorway, taking it all in. Everyone was staring at me but I hardly noticed. I didn't take off my shoes and kick them to the corner. I didn't throw my keys on the coffee table and I didn't yell for dinner. This wasn't my home anymore and I really couldn't shake the feeling that I didn't belong here.


	4. Chapter 4

I had eventually decided to sit on the couch and the gang filled in around the living room. We had spent the afternoon talking, something that, I'm sure has never been done before in this house. I reminisced to the times when I would wrestle with Pony, play cards with Steve, give Darry back rubs and watch Mickey with Two-Bit in this very room, with these very people. I couldn't imagine doing any of that now. How things have changed in only a year!

Two-Bit and Steve left before dinner, each needing to change before work later that night. Darry stood up and recruited Pony to help with dinner, leaving me sitting on the couch.

I was overwhelmed with all the changes I've experienced just this one day. Thankfully after the diner, the talk had been a little more superficial and I hadn't learned any more life-changing information from the gang. I couldn't handle all these changes. I guess I was stupid for thinking life wouldn't have gone on without me but it just hurts that it did go on without me.

As of now though, it was my first day back to the States and I sure as hell wasn't going to let all these changes get in the way. I vowed to not think about it. I wouldn't think that my little brother grew up or that my older brother isn't nearly the same person he was before he left-now without the stress of meeting bill's deadlines. For now, the only thing I was going to think about was how good this chicken sitting on my dinner plate, was going to taste.

It was sitting at the table that brought back another memory.

I took a deep breath and unfolded the paper. I took another look at Darry before the paper was completely open in my hands. He still had tears streaming from his eyes and his shoulders were beginning to shake. I wanted to go comfort him but the growing anticipation of the letter in my hands was too much.

I couldn't take my eyes off the paper. I read it three times before laying it down on the table. I folded my hands under my chin and looked over at Pony. He still didn't know what was going on and looked more scared than I'd ever seen him. He looked at me hopefully. Maybe I could tell him Darry was being crazy. His eyes pleaded for me to tell him that Darry was overreacting and I wish more than ever to be able to tell him that was the case. My eyes filled with tears at the fact I couldn't comfort my brother now.

"You hadn't even been eighteen for a month," Darry said more to himself than to me. I could only nod. "It's not fair, Soda. You are too damn young!" He wasn't yelling but his voice was firm and loud. I nodded again and he took a breath. "That's why you are going to enroll in school again. They don't take people in school. You'll be alright. We'll be alright." His voice was somehow calm but still demanding.

Pony caught on now and sat slumped over in his chair shaking his head that this couldn't be true.

"I need to do this." I said somberly. I wasn't looking at anything instead just staring into space.

"Soda, it'll be fine. We'll get you in school. I looked up the number. We just have to call and say you are in school and they made a mistake-"

"Darry, I need to do this." I cut off his rambling, unable to listen to the false hope. I was going to go fight in this war. I had to. I was expected to and I don't like to let anyone down.

I looked at Pony who still hadn't said a word. He was staring at me, burning a hole right in my forehead. Tears streamed down his face and he looked so helpless. He knew I made up my mind. Darry though, was getting angrier by the second and by now had let out a serious of frustrated huffs before he could think of anything to say.

"Damnit Soda," he shook his head and took one quick look at me before he collapsed helplessly on the table. He was uncontrollably wailing now and I couldn't hold back my own tears. I wasn't scared and I really couldn't understand why Darry was either. This was something I had to do. I was called to do it and I would.

"Soda, I couldn't get out of my shift tonight but I could still call in if you want." Darry was clearing the dinner plates.

"Nah, me and Pony can hang out tonight." He looked a little hurt at my answer but nodded his head and started the water.

"Pony, you got the dishes."

"aw Dar, but I have homework to do before tomorrow and it's a lot since I missed classes today," he complained while getting up and heading for the sink anyway.

"So how's the bar going for ya Darry? How long you been working there now?" I followed Darry into the living room where he was picking up stray glasses and clothes left out.

"hmm guess about two and a half years now. I'm getting good at it and the money's real good." Darry started working nights at a local bar during the weekend while continuing roofing during the days. It left him drained and a little cranky by the end of the week but we had money rolling in. I'd never seen him at the bar. He'd always say I'm too young to be seeing what goes on there. That never made sense since I've been to more than enough parties at Buck's which he knew about. I imagined him to be a great bartender. He'd get a lot of tips from the cute broads all drooling over him.

"Hey Pony, get your homework done. We're visiting Darry." I hollered when I saw Darry pull out of the drive way.

"Soda, Darry doesn't want me going to the bar especially not on a school night," he complained as we walked out the door a half hour later. I could tell he was confused so I tried to think back to before I'd left. Would I have taken him to a bar? I couldn't remember and was getting really antsy anyway so I shook it from my head.

"So what have you been up to, kid? You've been pretty quiet." Pony was always pretty quiet but he seemed even more so today. Maybe it was just because I was used to the constant chaos of the yelling, shooting or sirens being set off of Vietnam.

"I'm fine," was all he said and I reached over to pull him closer as we walked. "It's good to have you home, Soda." I ruffled his hair and playfully pushed him away.

"It's good to be home," and I meant it.


End file.
